alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
So much rum. So many feels.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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