Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm passing your future prison.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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