we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
