I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
