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Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
