The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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