did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
