her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
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I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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