You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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