my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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