Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!" http://tfl.nu/83kf
  Replies (22) Good night (1414) Bad night (11593)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin? http://tfl.nu/67r3
  Replies (29) Good night (4243) Bad night (1091)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences" http://tfl.nu/bi6b
  Replies (16) Good night (4901) Bad night (1484)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid http://tfl.nu/8jas
  Replies (9) Good night (6792) Bad night (872)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean. http://tfl.nu/5uk0
  Replies (6) Good night (4248) Bad night (1275)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks. http://tfl.nu/qdu7
  Replies (26) Good night (944) Bad night (5819)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again. http://tfl.nu/aob4
  Replies (3) Good night (918) Bad night (2964)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night http://tfl.nu/eq6t
  Replies (2) Good night (830) Bad night (1246)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing. http://tfl.nu/nz2e
  Replies (11) Good night (1130) Bad night (1477)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed. http://tfl.nu/np6x
  Replies (5) Good night (1763) Bad night (846)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar http://tfl.nu/sljc
  Replies (13) Good night (1333) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Feel free to use me as a reference.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack. (778): Feel free to use me as a reference. http://tfl.nu/6uxg
  Replies (8) Good night (1644) Bad night (444)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text http://tfl.nu/gbkg
  Replies (28) Good night (1593) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  How can a condom be "half used"?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (218): Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face (763): How can a condom be "half used"? http://tfl.nu/3d85
  Replies (13) Good night (1349) Bad night (606)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (906): A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious. http://tfl.nu/r6bp
  Replies (4) Good night (860) Bad night (215)

Randomize