how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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