I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
