I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Walk of Shame today included voting.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Randomize
