My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I love having hate sex.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize