i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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