Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
