just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
We need to get me chipped asap
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
