There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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