When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
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Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
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It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Two words: nipple clamps
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