everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize