You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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