We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize