you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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