you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
