remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
