Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
