I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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