super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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