i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
The feeling are messing with the penis
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
