By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Dignity is for republicans.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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