You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
