Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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