yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Randomize
