Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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