My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
