How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
