You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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