oh god the rape fog is back!
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize