How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
