Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I will pee on everything he values.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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