even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
