well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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