I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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