the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
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