I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
