Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
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