I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
