i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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