it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Shame is for Republicans.
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