I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
